I never knew if I wanted children, but when my wife became pregnant the first time (she ended up miscarrying), I knew my life needed this change. This may sound strange, but I am still not completely over the miscarriage (which occured in 1993).
I work full-time. I used to have a job I was proud of - manager over a group of technical writers. I enjoyed that job. The globalization efforts of my company eliminated that department and I was lucky enough to keep a job with the company. I say "lucky" because I make a pretty good salary (especially for someone who needs to finish his BS). I have an AS degree and am fairly close to getting the BS, but right now, I'm fighting the need to finish the BS - mostly because I think it is "BS."
My current job is ok. I sit at a computer and create schedules and keep a close eye on fairly important items for my company. I used to be known as a "fast riser" or "high potential" employee, but somehow I screwed this up and now my opinions are not as imprantant to upper mgmt. Back when I was thought of as a top notch employee, I was awarded the company's President's award (top honors for my company - it was really a big deal). I'm not sure how I since screwed up. I am not "liked" as I once was. I am no longer one of "the guys" people counted on. But I guess as long as they pay my salary I will stay. The best part of my job involves my schedule - my boss (who does not like me - hey, maybe this is where the "shunted" feelings come from) allows me to come in early (between 5 and 5:30AM EST) and leave around 2:30PM. Since being transferred to Atlanta, I am fairly tight on how late I stay each day. This is for two reasons - the later I stay, the traffic gets MUCH worse, and I want to be home for my kids. Maybe this is one of the reasons I am on the "bad" list - because I do not stay at work until 8PM every evening, brown nosing the VP's. But my time with my kids is too important for this stuff. Perhaps I should move on, but I don't think I am ready to do this. More on this later.
I was transferred from Knoxville, TN to the Atlanta facility in June 0f 2005. This was a VERY tough transition for me - personally. If my kids and wife weren't with me, I wouldn't have made it.
My hobbies include (in no specific order): whatever sports or interests my kids are into at any given time, my guns (I love to shoot and I am very responsible with my guns), weight lifting.
I am a Christian. I don't know how I could function without Christ by my side.
I live in a nice house (much nicer than I dreamed I could ever have). I hate to admit it, but I am proud to have made it possible to buy such a house. I know I should not be proud. But I am mostly proud for my wife and kids. Our house is four bedroom, three baths, two story. The master bedroom has a fireplace, setting room and vaulted ceilings. The bathroom for this bedroom is bigger than the master bedroom of my first house.
INSERT - After reviewing this part, I started feeling very guilty because I bragged and did not add a "thank you" to God for making all these good things possible. Please forgive me Father for being proud and for not giving you the thanks you so much deserve.
I have a strong case of OCD. I will get into that later.
I own a nice collection of guns. I have a legal concealed carry permit - and I do carry most times. Mostly, I carry my Glock 9mm (model 19). It is a very good pistol. Great design, shoots well (I'm a decent shot) and easy to clean and oil. I am not some kind of "lunatic" runnign around with a gun. This needs to be clear. I carry for two reasons: to protect my family, and to support my rights as a citizen of this country (as the 2nd Amendment give me the right to do so).
I have bad arthritis and my knees and shoulders are torn up - a lot of torn cartlidge, etc. My Dr explained that my arthritis is categorized as a three out of four (with one being "cold weather affected" and four being "bed-ridden"). My hands are starting to go. I just found this info out last Friday, but so far it really hasn't bothered me. I still lift weights. I can bench 340 lbs. I am trying to get to 380 lbs. (the max my weight bench can handle). I can bench 300 lbs at least five times. Not bad for a 42 year old, skinny, white boy. The problem is that I stay sore - and I take medicines to help with the pain (and to fall asleep). This is spooky (I will explain later).
I was born fairly poor, categorized as a poor, white trash kid, raised in a semi-rough part of town. My birthplace (and the town I lived in until I was 40) is Oak Ridge, Tennessee. I knew at an early age I was poor and seen as trash. It bothered me some. But I finally figured out that studying in college would greatly help me. I did and now I make a good salary. I am not rich - far from it (and I don't really care if I ever get "rich"). I am a lot better off than I ever dreamed I would be (I sure hope I don't jinx myself and go broke today since I've mentioned these things). But we get by pretty well. I have (knock on wood) maintained a great credit rating and I am not in debt up to my eyeballs (though the money does go by very quickly). I am paying for two vehicles, and I keep the typical bills and costs. Attn any thieves: Don't get any idea you can rip me off - I keep a close eye on my accounts and bills. We get the kids what they need (and a lot of what they want). My kids are very well behaved and are not spoiled at all (I am very adamant about raising them properly).
One more note - I am very protective of my wife and kids. Their safety and well-being are most important. I love my family very much. I can't wait to see my kids this afternoon and evening. But trust me, none of us are perfect. I do need to include some explaination about my twelve year old. Hopefully by writing this stuff down, I can better figure out how his mind works so that I can help him more. For the most part, my kids are normal, well balanced kids. But my twelve yr old has some issues. It is my responsibility to help him in every way possible. I do not want him growing up with the same insecurities and problems I had/have. I want him to be happy. I will get into that more.
I have spent enough time at this for now. I will definitely come back to it. It feels good to write down things. I have a lot to say and to try to explain. Maybe it will do me good to try to explain my craziness. I will get into this more later.
I will try to figure out how to make thisi "blog" viewable (I guess I want it to be found by people searching these sites). I would like to have a couple of honest pen pals.
A little bit more about myself: Christian, conservative (I like to argue current affairs), gun owner, 6'1", 196 lbs, size 35 waist, my hair is starting to get a bit thin in the back but I still have a full head of hair, green eyes, dark brown hair, semi-techno, fully hetero, love 70's rock (Lynyrd Skynyrd, Led Zep), and I like to joke. My two worst habits are: I still smoke (ultra lites) and I drive like my ass is on fire.
That's it for now.
posted by nfm @ 10:54 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home